"No amount of security is worth the suffering of a mediocre life chained to a routine that has killed your dreams" Maya Mendoza


My name’s Ellen. I’m in my late twenties, I’m a theatre maker and writer and I’ve started this blog as a way to hold myself accountable, and track my progress as I try to change my life. I hope that what I write can also be useful to you as you try to change some aspect of your life, or maybe your whole life.

This blog is about recognising if you’re chained to routine that’s killed your dreams and taking the plunge towards wholeheartedly pursuing those dreams. If you want to change your life then I hope we can support each other, if you’ve already done it then I welcome your advice.

Life is for living and time just keeps ticking on. Let’s try to be happy, let’s change the things we don’t like first in our own lives and then in the societies we live in.

Pursue your dreams

One distinct memory I have of my childhood is talking to my mum about work. I don’t know how old I was, maybe 7 or 8. I remember asking her why so many people hated their jobs? Why did they do work that didn’t make them happy? I couldn’t understand why anyone would choose a job they didn’t actively want to do. At that moment I vowed I would never work a 9-5 office job because I wouldn’t like it. My mum smiled a knowing smile.

Fast forward twenty years and I’ve been working a 9-5 office job for three years. And, whilst better than your average workplace, it still wasn’t something I particularly wanted to do; I wasn’t pursuing my dreams. So, when I read the quote above something in me shifted and I realised I had to make a change.

My dreams

My dream is to make my living from working as a freelance creative. To do the creative work I’m good at, the work I was made for. It might be an oversaturated market, but why should we discourage people doing the thing they are actually good at? And if it doesn’t work out, at least I tried and perhaps the journey I take will show me what I really should be doing.

My ultimate dream, that I’ve kept as a secret and dismissed as a dream always to remain in dreamland is to own a space.  A venue, a meeting place, a café, a garden, a resource. A vital community space. An open space. Somewhere where people, any people, can come to share art, food and ideas. To gain new skills, to reclaim space for themselves. To remember self care and play and creativity.

I’ve now admitted to myself that I actually want this to happen. This is the ultimate goal of my life change. It’s a long way off yet, but it’s nice to have the picture to work towards.

Now, let’s get started. As Julie Andrews tells us the very beginning is a very good place to start, read the very beginning of my journey here.